Linda’s family chose to say goodbye at home, creating a personal and intimate farewell. This blog explores how home funerals can offer a warm, meaningful way to celebrate a loved one’s life.
On a crisp, sunny morning in North Wales, I set off to lead a funeral ceremony. But instead of turning off the A55 towards the familiar gates of my local crematorium, I drove past and continued to the home of Linda and her family.
As I stepped into the open-plan kitchen, the atmosphere was filled with warmth and gentle energy. Conversations overlapped as family and friends caught up over cups of tea, while the autumn sunlight streamed through the patio doors. A caterer quietly prepared an inviting afternoon tea. I was warmly welcomed by Linda’s family, who introduced me to people who knew her.
A hearse arrived in the driveway, and Andy, the funeral director, gently carried Linda’s coffin through the garden gate, along the path, and into the kitchen. The sunshine was warm enough to leave the doors open to the garden. The open plan kitchen had been lovingly transformed, furniture rearranged, chairs set in rows where the dining table once stood, and framed photographs of Linda surrounded by family and friends placed carefully on display. A candle burned softly, and a beautiful bouquet of flowers filled the air with its delicate fragrance.
As everyone settled in, some on sofas, others on bar stools or dining chairs, I began by welcoming them to Linda’s celebration of life. I shared how much Linda had hated a fuss and how the relaxed, heartfelt ceremony had been planned with her wishes in mind.
Together, we journeyed through Linda’s life. Her husband, children, and granddaughter shared touching tributes. Her daughter spoke about Linda’s wish to come home during her final days, a wish the family couldn’t fulfil as Linda was too unwell. She explained that instead, they honoured her memory by bringing her home for this final goodbye.
The ceremony concluded with a poem read by a close friend, followed by a moment of quiet reflection as Willie Nelson’s “Always on My Mind” played. Family and friends found their own ways to say goodbye. Some approached Linda’s coffin to place a hand on it, offering a private farewell. Others admired the flowers or stood quietly, lost in thought. People spilled out onto the patio to enjoy the autumn sunshine. There was no sense of rush—only calm and space for everyone to take what they needed.
When the time felt right, Linda’s family signalled they were ready. Andy carried the coffin back up the garden path to the hearse. I accompanied the family to the local crematorium for the final farewell. Together, we walked into the chapel, where Linda’s coffin was placed on the catafalque. As one of her favourite pieces of music played, we said a few final words before the curtains closed around her coffin.
Back at Linda’s home, the wider family and friends had already gathered again, sharing conversation, laughter, and memories over a buffet. When her close family returned from the crematorium, they were welcomed back into a house filled with warmth and love, just as Linda would have wanted.
Weeks after Linda’s funeral, her ceremony stayed with me. I’ve had the privilege of leading many unique and personal funerals, but this was the first I’d conducted in the home of the person who had passed. Wanting to share her story with care and respect, I reached out to Linda’s daughter, who kindly gave her blessing and shared her reflections on the day:
“The word ‘funeral’ doesn’t really feel right for what we did. It was a celebration of Mum and the amazing things she did. And while she didn’t like a fuss, we needed to find a balance between what she would have wanted and what we needed to process our grief.
The day felt calm, personal, and intimate. People told me afterward how much it had meant to them and how they’d never been to a funeral like that before. They felt part of what was happening—not just passively sitting in an audience. People who might not have felt comfortable speaking at a lectern were able to say a few words in our kitchen because it felt so informal, and that was really lovely.
Weeks on, Dad looks back fondly on the day, and I think it’s really helped him. Every time the sun shines through the patio windows, we remember her. Dad tells me, ‘It was exactly what your Mum would have wanted.’”
Andy Lambert from Lambert & Sons shared his thoughts about Linda's celebration:
"Lambert & Sons understands how transformative it can be to have a funeral which is a fitting reflection of the person who has died.
It was an honour to care for Linda and to serve her family’s wishes to celebrate her life within the comfort of the family home."
Linda’s ceremony was a beautiful reminder of how meaningful and personal a home farewell can be. It allowed her family and friends to grieve, celebrate, and remember her in a setting filled with love and comfort. This kind of ceremony isn’t for everyone, but for those who feel it’s right, it can offer a deeply healing and intimate way to say goodbye.
